“I hate instant potatoes so much right now”

“I hate instant potatoes so much right now”

All hikers ever really talk about is food right? It’s top 5 for us (the others being poop, weather, miles and sex) and is without a doubt, the most important of those five. Napoleon is credited with saying that “An army moves on it’s stomach” and that holds just as much truth for hikers as it does for soldiers.

So how did Invictus come to the point where she hated eating instant mash? Pretty much the same way I came to hate eating chicken flavored pasta, pop-tarts, oatmeal, banana chips and several other things. We ate it everyday without fail.

Seriously. I’ll never eat oatmeal again in my life. Ever.

Nothing quite like attractive ladies and Loaded Baked
Rainbow still likes to eat the insta mash… but only just barely I think

Limited choices on the trail in a fact of life, and you can get tired of anything. Bison got tired of eating Mountain Houses by the end of the trail, and was more than willing to trade delicious chicken tetrazzini for mac and cheese! So when you’re surviving on mail drops, hiker boxes and goodwill in order to finish, you just get tired of eating.

Their families love them
Terp and Gourmet always had awesome mail drops… It made the rest of us a little jealous

Food is the most important thing in the world. Without it, you’re angry (hangry, it’s a thing – go look it up) and depressed, no energy and you can’t do a thing. That’s why it’s important to vary your food and find things you like to eat.

Hiking a long distance trail is probably the only time in your life that you can eat anything you want. So we take advantage of that: eat all the bacon you want, cake, pie, triple patty bacon cheeseburgers, everything off the Wendy’s dollar menu… you get what I mean.

So go eat! Everything and anything. Enjoy your food on the trail and keep it varied. Pack out a cake, some Admiral Crunch (I’ve decided the Captain needs a promotion) or even a couple of steaks. There is nothing more delicious than eating a steak you’ve cooked on the fire after hiking out of town.

Pro Tip: Carry spices with you. There is a reason I’m called Doc Spice and hint hint, it’s because I carried things like Montreal Steak seasoning all the time.

Food is wonderful. It still makes me happy.

On the Edhe Farm is still one of my favorite places
On the Edge Farm has delicious pies, made fresh that morning ready for you. Mixed-Berry Crisp is still my favorite there.

This pie? This pie was like heaven. It would have been good anywhere, but after hiking 10 miles to it? Heaven.

6 Replies to ““I hate instant potatoes so much right now””

    1. I never stopped loving insta mash, except for a one week period in NJ/NY/CT. Hell I love them so much they were my usual lunch.. cold insta mash right in the bag. Ready to eat! 400 calories say what!

      1. Bet you spiced them up a little. Loaded baked was my go-to. There are more flavors now than there used to be. Bacon & Chipotle exists now!

  1. For trips up to half a week, I’ve been carrying a small box of feta cheese. It’s too salty to go bad, and adds some flavor to the horrible freeze-dried gruel I carry.

  2. For the record, I only had instant mashed potatoes *maybe* TWICE on the trail (except for when I mixed them with pasta sides and ramen–then they’re fine) and both times I wanted feed them to any creature that venture near my camp.


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